GOODBYE 2011 :))

 HELLO 2012 Closing of another chapter. Lord God thank you for all the blessings.. Thank you Guys for being part of this year..!! SEE YOU AGAIN on 2012!!! BOOM!

GET BACK IN TRACK

I know this is just a piece of trash. I want to get back myself in editing. Need more practice & make new artworks to improve myself. How I wish I can make my own vector art. The heck? I’ve been practicing that thing last month but gaaad i really hate you pentool~! :( ehm I that stupid? hahaha I want moree inspiration!!! aside from him lol. I love you MOH :D

Big Changes on 2012 for me. :)

i find this very true. no matter how hard a day has been for you, or a year, or a person, they were put there to propel you towards something so much better. and at the time, they may seem like the only thing you want, but you have to know that there will always be something/someone out there for you. it’s waiting to be found. it’s waiting to find you. take your time to heal, but don’t lag. time is a horrible thing to waste. it is up to you to find out what it is you need; what it is you want. because if you can’t figure it out, who will? big changes on 2012 for me. what’s your plan?

Every one has a limit.

There’s only so much that a person can take, we’ll all of us have our breaking point at some time. After all, we all are human. To be human, emotions comes along with it. Even when you think you’re cold hearted and you don’t give a fuck about the world, those are still emotions. Feeling empty and emotionless is still a feeling.

Thank you Fav. Xtian Torres

Another Vector Art from my Favorite artist Christian Torres. Thank you so much Fav!!. I know you did a lot of effort to make this one ahhmm I just want you to know that I am so thankful to have you as my friend. :)) ehyyoo Merry Christmas!!! Guys do check his Tumblr -->> http://dirteaicecream.tumblr.com/

CUTE+SWEET

with my very cute niece (Lee) 

WewoooooWaaaa :D

Thank you so much for this.. :D

o you kno, jus chillen..

been drunk.My brother do I understand mee.. :( I thought after I drunk I can sleep for long hours. Hell I'm awake right now. Damn. headache..

Don’t fucking tell me I changed when you were the one who changed me.

.

As cliche as it sounds..

I’ve always fantasied about a perfect relationship. I just want to know what it feels like to be so attached to a person. To be able to trust a person with all your heart. No bullshit, no mixed feelings. But we all know, in the end, it’ll be over. Hurt feelings will be familiar again and you’ll ask yourself why you wanted to be in that relationship in the first place. It’s a cycle. I hate it.

accidentally grew into a special bond.

No expectations, no set times to do something, no appointments, no plans. What’s so great about this is that it’s full of surprises. It’s probably the best feeling I receive when I find something positive along this way. This applies to many things but especially applies to that significant other you find unexpectedly. No intentions with that person, not even friends, but somehow it just accidentally grew into a special bond. :)

I Hate?

I hate when you’re in that sticky situation where you don’t know where you stand with that one person. Are we friends? Are you mad at me? Are you into me like I’m into you? I hate when you don’t know and everything is kind of just like murky water. I hate when you’re unsure of whether to ask where you stand with someone because of the fear that they might think the complete opposite. I hate when you’re dying to know what’s next but you’re afraid of taking the leap. I hate when you wish you could come clean and just talk to that person about everything but the possibility of being rejected pushes you back. I hate that feeling you get when you’re about ready to give up but then that person says/does something that keeps you holding on. I hate that moment when you realize what’s best for you but you do the opposite because of that temporary happiness. I hate when you feel so tired of not knowing that you finally just stop caring then that person says something to confuse you all over again. And I fucking hate how this is all going on while the other person doesn’t know you feel this way. (confused) :(

It’s crazy to think that I never knew anyone at one point.

The only people I ever needed were my parents. And now, I’ve met so many people, all of them influencing me in one form or another. Whether it was a stranger on the street who shot me a smile or someone who became close to me and let me down in the end, I am what they’ve made of me. What drives my thoughts, my actions, my ideas are the people I’ve met. It’s inevitable that I’m going to come across even more people who will continue to change my life. Billions of people in this world and we all have our stories. I think it’s all crazy, seriously. I think it’s crazy how I don’t know any of you yet you guys understand what I’m trying to say. I think it’s crazy how the people I do know are still trying to figure me out. I think it’s crazy how my family doesn’t know everything about me anymore like how they used to.

 I think it’s crazy how the people closest to me are still sometimes the furthest away. I think it’s crazy how someone who I didn’t know a year ago means a shit-ton to me now. Like, were you meant to come into my life? I was at SM the other day and in line, I looked around at all the faces and wondered to myself what their situation is and for a moment, we were all waiting for the same thing, we were all in the same situation. I was on an escalator and again, I wondered to myself where we were all going to end up in life and for a moment we were all headed the same way, with the same destination. It’s like, even though every individual is different with our own little, peculiar traits that makes us who we are, we’re still the same while we’re trying to be different. We’ve all had the same thoughts at one point, felt the same way, gone through the same thing. I can’t completely understand why people always say “you don’t know how I feel, you don’t know what it’s like to be me,” because, in some strange sense, I do. Although some cases are worse than others, everyone knows what it feels like to be hurt, happy, and all that shit. It’s a strange and amazing thing, the fact that we spend a whole entire life time just to figure out what life is. And at the end of it all, we’ve wasted the years by accompanying ourselves with people who’s in it for the same thing, themselves.

 Even the people whose life goal is to help others, they’re doing that for themselves in a sense, because it makes themselves happy. We’re all just tryna do the same thing here, be happy. But it’s crazy because, we’re all unhappy at one point because of others but they’re just trying to be happy too. LOL FUCK MAN, am I the only who thinks all this shit makes sense?

PHOTO

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. 

FOREVER YOUNG

This is one of my favorite shot. So I did some revision I haven't done this kind of textography/ typography in quite a long time! And looky in the right bottom of the text, my watermark!!! I haven't used that for like the longest time! It just felt right to put it there since it kind of blends in but still prevents others from stealing my photos. I get quite frustrated when people put my photos up on tumblr and don't link it back to my site ): I'm not able to "stalk" I hear from my friends that they are there. I beg of you guys please don't put my photos up on any other site without my permission! I would just like to know where my photo is going and that it is linked back to me! Thanks so much guys! and wow i typed a lot today bwuahaha well it makes sense, cause i don't have school tmr :)

oneofmybiggestflaws

honestly, i’m way too chill about everything. even when things piss me off, i like keeping to myself. and that’s what usually gets me walked on. i don’t like conflict, confrontation, it’s pointless. so i try to avoid it as much as possible by just kicking back and letting it go but sometimes, it’s taken as push-over-ness. when in reality, i just don’t wanna get mad about something that can be avoided so i just chill. i’m always telling my friends to just chill out and they’re always telling me i need to put my foot down. maybe it’s time i do. idk, but i don’t like being taken advantage of just cause i don’t raise my voice. maybe the fact that i’m always joking around also pushes people to believe that i don’t care about alot of things. which is true, i honestly don’t care about most things but there’s a certain point where someone just takes it too far. the only thing i really get set off by is by people close to me cause they know all my secrets and they should know not to do a certain thing. idk.. but whatevs, can’t really do anything about it i guess. just how i am even though i wish i could change it

im not prepared for the future but im ready for whatevers to come. ill never be prepared but i feel like thats what makes me so ready. im excited to embark on new journeys. i am more than ready to explore the unknown.

What I love :D

yeaaa!!

Bored.

seems like lately, i don’t really have shit to say anymore lol

i’m beginning to stray away from a lot of distractions.

i’m starting to reduce the amount of time wasted on social networking and mindless web surfing and actually becoming productive. i don’t wanna be stuck doing the same thing with the same people all the time anymore. i don’t wanna be stuck in this little bubble man. just day by day, spending less time on useless shit and spending more on something beneficial. really trying to meet new people and expand, explore, and experience. even though i love what i got now, i just think it’s time for more.

Drunk-calls

I just received one of the most random drunk-calls ever. It was from an old friend of mine who never drank and always tried to lead the best life. I was kind of shocked to hear him in that kind of state. Anyway, he proceeded to tell me this, “I regret everyday what I did to you because you know, you could have been mine right now. And I’m so stupid and I hated myself for months because of what I did. I just wanna let you know that I miss you, a lot. And I don’t care what anyone else says about you, you’re fucking amazing. You can make anyone laugh and you’re so cute, look at you. You never did me wrong but I chose to hurt you and I’m sorry, okay? Cee, are you happy? I just want you to be happy. I think you just try to tell yourself that you’re happy but at the end of the day, you and I both know you’re not. Even though it seems like you have such a fun and eventful life, I know you’re pretty empty. I love you, take care.”

Cold Christmas. :( imissyou

You know, I always thought I’d text you first thing every Christmas and say how much I appreciate you and talk the night away. I thought we’d hang out in this cold weather, cruise around listening to the music we liked in your car, eat the same thing we liked, talk about everything like we used to. I thought we’d talk about how much Christmas was so crappy this year but we were glad to have each other. I know this sounds lame, but the only person I wanted to say Merry Christmas to me was you and you’re not even here to do so. Ain’t nothin’ merry about this Christmas without you. So many couples around me, exchanging kisses and gifts. All I wanted was your voice to soothe me at night before falling asleep and knowing I don’t need anything else for a gift but you. But that's so impossible I know. :( imissyou so much. I wish you were here. 3 years babe. 3 years without you & counting.....

I love having different groups of friends.

They absolutely complete my day today & It's so pretty awesome to get along with this people with different awesome personalities. It’s interesting to get to know different types of people.  “I am a combined effort of everyone I have ever known”. Thank you again guys.! I LOVE YOU ALL! :)

Myjo, Marie, mah fren Kazumari,Part Jay, Nick, Pitch, Jepio, Jaque, Joshua, uzi.. :DD THANK ^^ YOU.,

You can never forgive someone too often.

When someone screws up and you forgive them time and time again, it only pushes them to believe that they can get away with almost everything. Each time, forgiveness becomes less and less appreciated. I’m convinced that forgiveness is one of the most important things in the world, it liberates you from all grudges and helps create better relationships with people you may not want to get rid of. Don’t allow them to think they can hurt you constantly and be able to avoid confrontation. Always confront someone when something is wrong but in a polite and understanding manner, it makes a difference, foreal. No one’s going to want to cooperate and listen to your ass when you’re angry before even speaking. It’s hard to swallow your pride but it’s harder to lose a friend or hold a grudge. Everyone deserves a chance to be listened to and forgiven. But when people take such a precious gift as forgiveness and is left unchanged, forgive and forget. Don’t hold a grudge and choose to be civil man. Just forgive them then forget them.

Isn’t it fucked up how some of us can be surrounded by chill vibes and good times everyday yet at the end of each one of those days, we are still unsatisfied with ourselves and every aspect of our lives?

If they can hold a conversation with me

One of the first things I look for in someone is if they can hold a conversation with me. It’s not easy to keep me amused and striving for someone’s attention. So when someone has got me thinking about them and wanting to talk to them, they stick out to me. I really like meaningful conversations, they help me look at things differently, learn about that person, or just understand things better. I can get so much out of a good conversation and that’s what I like to walk away with. So when people keep me guessing and wanting to know more about them and their life and interests, lol damn.

Sleep Paralysis (OLD HAG SYNDROME)

I had numerous, almost nightly episodes. Mine are most commonly visual, where i can see the surrounding room very vividly, and the scaries are vivid, too.. Hearing stories about it and going through it is so different. I just laid there, thinking a million thoughts at once. Tried hella hard to move but I was just stuck and I tried saying shit but just started laughing in my head because I probably looked stupid. I don’t know, although sleep paralysis was pretty scary, it was kind of a cool experience. I don’t want to go through it again ‘cause the thought of it was pretty scary. Plus, when I gained more consciousness of this whole thing, I realized my laptop was still on but the screen was blank. Pretty weird if you ask me. I just remember like praying. I would have been more freaked out and like, woke up my brother or some shit but I was too tired so I just fell asleep :)

Goodnight cee :D

I’ll go to bed with a blanket to keep me warm, my stomach filled with food, and my family not too far away from me. I’ll go to sleep knowing that I’ll awake tomorrow with the sun shining through the crevices of my blinds. I’ll wake up tired, but ready. I’m blessed and grateful.

I am Forgiven

I am Forgiven…Today I am thankful for the act of forgiveness. Just as the Lord casts our sins into the deepest depths of the ocean and above all FORGETS our sins we have committed against him, we should extend this grace to others and forgive them as well. It is so easy to not forgive someone who has wronged us. We can easily write them off and hold a grudge. But that is not what God wants us to do because he did not do that to us. I am grateful for Gods forgiveness and hope that just as He has forgiven me, that people that I have ever wronged might forgive me as well.

we can all just have fun together

I hate when people, especially people close to you, bitch about you becoming close to their friends. Sure, it is a little bit annoying at first (only when they don’t invite you or hang out behind your back) but what the fuck, wouldn’t you be glad that all your friends can get together without drama and just kick it? I don’t know.. Maybe it’s just me who sees it that way. I don’t mind when my friends from different groups become chill, it’s better for me that way. I don’t need to choose who to kick it with, I don’t need to keep up with different people and shit, we can all just have fun together. I don’t see why people get so territorial over friends, they’re fucking people, not your damn property. It’s annoying if they’re just out to get you jealous or one-up you but what are the odds of that? Maybe they just enjoy other people’s company? Maybe they wanna meet new people? Whatever the reason is, who the fuck cares? CAN’T WE ALL JUST ABONG, SHIT. I don’t care if you’re from this group, or if I’m from this group, or if she’s your friend first, or if he’s your friend later, LET’S JUST ALL HANGOUT WITHOUT ANY OF THAT UNNECESSARY BULLSHIT AND ANIMOSITY. I swear, I thought I knew people better than that. (sorry for the bad word. it sucks.. #GFSAHJKASKLAKAKGFADGAHS)

you know what bugs?

when people just don’t know how to chill. not chill as in, be chill and calm down, but chill as in hanging out without having to do anything all that spectacular. i know some people who are always like “i don’t wanna go cause we’re not gonna do anything anyway.” LOL WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THAT? who caressss, just come and hang out and something will come up. even when we’re out with a big group, people still complain, “omg i’m so bored.. we’re just sitting around talking” LOL, AGAIN, WHO THE FUCK CARES. asdgfasdgasdasdg get that stick out of your ass and chill the fuck out.

need to be in a relationship in order to be happy?

I’m noticing more and more people feel like they need to be in a relationship in order to be happy. “You don’t understand, we’ve been through so much, they taught me so much about myself, they helped me become who I am. We can’t just be friends, it won’t work.” No, I do understand. I understand that you want to be involved with someone emotionally so that you feel like you matter. Stop thinking like a typical love-sick teenager. You two can, in fact, remain friends. It’s foolish to think that you can’t.

Rainy Cold Weather :)

Add caption
i love rainy cold weather. i love the apparel that goes along with this weather. i love how it’s so cold but i feel nice and toasty on the inside. 

i love that it’s an excuse to cuddle with someone. i love the frosty air and the trips to starbucks. I love menthol especially in this weather, all crisp and shit. i love waking up and falling asleep to the rain.i love how music sounds a kajillion times better. i just fucking love this weather lol. 

Robinson's Tagaytay

i love christmas season.

@ MOA with Cedie & Em :)

Merry Christmas! :)

its so pretty and nice, everyones happy, i don’t know, it just makes me really excited :D Its' already December 03 and I'm still waiting for my big blessing this Christmas.. can't wait! :)

Stay Strong.

I keep having re-occurring dreams about you. It’s been 3 years since you’ve passed but almost every night, you’re there. In my dreams, I’m always holding you and having a really special moment with you but something doesn't feel right. Almost like the time when you began to get sick. But I guess I should be thankful that I still get to see and hold you in my dreams. But I hate that harsh reality when I wake up only to know you’re still in the ground.i miss you so bad. iloveyou jonathan. I know i should stay strong. :( This song is for you <3

In a Relationship

Liking someone is not a good enough reason to be in a relationship with that person. Because they are sweet and nice to you is not a good enough reason to be in a relationship with that person. The way they make you feel is not a good enough reason either. Like someone all you want but think long and hard before you get into a relationship. That’s how you avoid teenage heartbreaks you bunch of lovesick..


Done with this video. Suggested by my friend Kevin (poy poy) ehy! its nice. :D

The Click Five - Empty 

and now I stop using my phone for a while. I don't have enough money as of now to register unlicall for 1 week. lol i will miss my friends who I used to call everyday. 

learn to appreciate loyal and real homies

don’t wonder why you’re left with no true friends anymore when you’ve pushed them away on your own. learn to appreciate loyal and real homies when they’ve always been right infront of you, supporting and doing everything for you instead of putting “party people” ahead of them. that shit ain’t cool. know your limits, the people who helped you get to where you are, and the people who will help you get further in life. forget about the bitches who probably will forget about you first anyway. forget about the ones you party with and think they’re truly down for you and your shit when they’re not. who’s gonna help you out when you’re drunk af throwing up, in danger, sad, hurt, and all that. sure, anyone can hold your hair and tell you “don’t worry, everything will be okay” but wtf none of that means shit when it comes from people who aren’t real and genuine friends.

You're such a USER-FRIENDLY =)

I’ve been mistreated and taken advantage of so many times especially when they need me to edit something or to give extra load by everyone I have ever gotten close to so now, 


You're such a USER-FRIENDLY.. ehy? seriously don't even say
"CEE THANK YOU FOR YOUR HELP.!" :D 


I honestly don’t even care what they do to me anymore. 
I just let them do whatever they wish and when it just so happens to hurt me, I either get over it really quickly or can’t feel it at all. Okay.. I know that's life. :)) 

I want to feel Again.

How long will it be until I realize that I can’t go on doing this forever? By “this,” I mean breezing by with no determination to change. Maybe I’ve already realized it because it’s a constant thought in this little mind of mine. “I need to start doing this, I need to quit doing that, I need change.” It’s what’s causing me from finally finding happiness. Because I’m still here, the same old person with the same disgusting intentions when I know I could be doing something better. All this thinking isn’t going to do anything for me unless I finally face my obligations to move on with my life. 

I can sit here and reflect all I want, listen to same songs that trigger the same memory and hopes. Yet, executing such realizations is a dud or rather a figment of hope. I only wish to step up and adapt to the time passing by and the changes that accompany it. However, I find myself watching it all pass by me hoping that the world would stop for me to be ready. I’m hoping for it to just stop for a second and wait for me to catch up. I’m wanting to have fun and get by with no worries for as long as I can but I know I can’t. I know the time will come soon or maybe it’s already showed itself to me. But for now, I’m holding it all off, wishing that I’d wake up one morning a different person, a person of passion and determination that actually gets me somewhere.

I’m not talking about the determination of a mindless teenager who wants good grades or a new car or to lose 10 lbs. I just want to be able to feel something again. Anything at all. Everything’s just happening, just passing me by and I feel nothing. Nothing at all that makes me want to hop along for the change. I want to know what it’s like to feel something again. I need to change in order for that to happen. It all starts here with myself and myself only. I just want to feel again.

BOUCHON

Bouchon Bakery

blueberry cheesecake macaron

OH MY GOD BOUCHON [caps]

CHEERS LM PHOTOGRAPHY

CONGRATS!! for the SUCCESFUL OPENSHOOT of LM Photography.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY bro! Lord-Michael Angeles .. iloveyou! 


Paopee Nanale Giru Mercado & the rest of PROJECT LM TEAM..!! :)) CHEERS!

Photo

i wanna do something like this soon. . . 

Photo

WOW! such a romantic view.. hehe someday i want this to be the window of my bedroom, or living room, whatever. i just want to have a view like this wherever i live someday.. :)

I wish I knew how to better express my thoughts verbally.

- Yep thats me.. Haha

IRRELEVANT.

Stop invading my privacy

Nothing is more annoying than someone constantly begging for your attention and calling/texting nonstop. Nothing pushes me away more than someone smothering me. I have a life that consists of priorities that trump you in every single way possible. I have hobbies that I like to keep up with. I have friends that I would choose over you in a second. If you aren’t close to me, stop invading my privacy by trying to get personal, it doesn’t work that way. Nothing is more of a turn-off than knowing that someone sits in the palm of my hands, basically giving themselves to me. That’s no fun and you need to learn how to play the game a little better. Enough with the emotional shit, you don’t know me at all if you think that’d be a good fucking idea lol ..

Being Alone

There is just something in me that always finds a reason to want to be alone. I enjoy the silence, the privacy with just me, myself and I. Don’t get me wrong, company is great but I find myself wanting to be by myself more than I want to be surrounded by people. I don’t know what it is or why it has to be that way. It’s affected my relationships with many people. I detach myself from someone before I can ever know what it really means to have feelings for someone; by feelings, I’m talking cold, hard, genuine feelings instead of lust. In my past friendships, I’ve watched some of the most important people walk away from me because I didn’t mind the isolation. It sucked for a moment but I found myself getting better by what I do best, being alone. My thoughts, a pen and some paper, and music suffice. Being alone brings me peace but I also believe that this will become something that will drive me the fuck insane. Maybe it already has because I actually believe that being alone is better sometimes.

My Desire

My desire to keep expanding while traveling exceeds my reach right now. One of these days in the future, I’ll be halfway across the universe still listening to music and seeing the world in a different perspective, taking on new challenges to discover and better myself. But for now, I’ll stay within this little town with the same faces and same adventures. Begin college with a standard job and any type of transportation that gets me from point A to point B. It’s nothing to complain about, I can wait until I am financially, mentally, and physically ready to literally take on the world. I’m not concerned with how I’ll spend my days in the meantime. Life here will without a doubt keep me busy. Until then, I’ll finish what I started here strongly and begin a new chapter of my life when the time has come. 

Single Life.

Single like a pringle, loooool ksahgasghasdh uhm, i don’t really care. it’s chill being single, i like it i guess. i just enjoy the company of certain people but it never escalates into anything more than that. unless they have some power to change that. iono, just doing my thing. not really expecting anything of any kind but we anythings possible so whatever haha..

I’ve grown so much.

Just in the past year, I’ve learned a lot. Things that I did in the past, I’d never consider doing now. I’m a lot smarter now, and it feels really good knowing that I’ve changed for the better. I feel content with who I am, therefore I’m content with life. Even if people still judge me from my past, it feels good to be reminded how far I’ve come along. 

This Photo was taken during our Photo Exhibit.

My friends. (Jen,Tobal,Em)